Sunday, February 27, 2011

6 Hours


I didn't hear Lizzie up until 7:00 this morning, and thank you Lord! I checked the bathroom, and all was DRY so I went back to bed just to relax even though I knew my sister was awake. An hour later I arose to find her pulling herself together in her bedroom. Whew!

Yet another hour later, Lizzie came into the kitchen all smiles and happy greetings until I told her that today was not a day to wear summer sneakers and brought her boots instead. Once we got them on her feet, however, she was fine with the change.

She really can't be left alone in the kitchen any more either. While I was getting ready for the day, she went into her pill-drawer and because she saw a cup of pills I had set out for dinner, she apparently thought those pills were for now and was starting to take them when I came into the kitchen. Now this would not have killed her, but it evidences my concerns about her being alone for even one moment or two.

I briefly mentioned to her that I think it is time we got a second home, and that a group home might be a good idea. Her response brought back the sister I have missed for so long. "Oh no I won't. You think a group home is so good, YOU go live in a group home." What do I say to that?

No Sleep Allowed

Just as I was dozing off shortly after the previous post, I heard "twin sister .... twin sister ..."

Lizzie was wide awake, and I don't even know for sure if she ever fell asleep since she went to bed 2 hours ago. She was fidgeting with the blankets, sighing deeply, and talking to herself. When I approached her with just the hall lights on, she said, "Twin sister, there's a dog in here. Where did that dog come from?" I reminded her that we have 2 dogs, and that what she thinks she saw was probably one of our dogs.

I thought wow ... she is too awake for me to get any sleep tonight, and I just can't imagine that possibility. So I gave her a sleeping aid / herb called Holy Basil. This is something I have found that helps me sleep when I need it too. I am not one for sleeping pills per se because of the addictive possibilities, so I did research at Whole Foods about what to use instead. Holy Basil seems to work well.

Lizzie is still talking to herself as I am writing this post. Maybe when all the lights go off she will settle down. Let's hope and pray so. Good night!

Saturday, February 26, 2011

A Prayer Request

I sent this letter out to my prayer warrior friends 2 days ago after a week of getting only 3-4 hours of sleep at night because I am tending to my sister's toiletry needs. Once I am awakened, it is difficult to fall back to sleep. I am feeling like a zombie during the day as I struggle to maintain and satisfy my job requirements. I can't believe this is happening.

My dear brothers and sisters in  Christ
I need prayer!
"And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints" (Ephesians 6:18). 

I am asking for your intercession bc I myself am struggling with daily exhaustion to the point that I can't even ATTEMPT a prayer ...
"In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express" (Romans 8:26). 

And so here's my situation:
As most of you know, Lizzie's dementia symptoms are increasing to the extent that I am feeling empty of that "grace" that has allowed me take care of her for so many years on my own.  I have been touring group homes for a couple of months now as an alternate living situation for her.  I have FINALLY found 2 (and am visiting one more today) that satisfy my standards of expectations.  This is one of the most important decisions I have had to make in my lifetime. 
I need help deciding which home to place her in, her adjustment with this new living arrangement, and I also need a spiritual uplifting of my broken spirit at this time. 
Matthew 18:20 ... "For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them."
Thank you, and may His peace be upon you in all your endeavors today!